It’s frustrating, isn’t it? You work on your coaching business day and night but the results are not matching the effort!
When this happens, we tend to feel cheated. (knee-jerk reaction victim response)
We should have gotten better results!
Come on, I put loads of time, effort, and money into this thing!
This leads to a sense of entitlement and this can lead to starting a “better” project, stewing for days, blaming, shaming, etc. This is the entitlement trap and if we don’t catch it at the early stage, it can consume us and the end result? We become both, the victim and the victimizer.
I personally feel a part of our brain is constantly looking for a reason not to grow, stretch, and be the best version of ourselves, out of fear and a need for safety. This part loves to point out poor results as a way to draw us back into playing it safe and just living a get by life. Don’t let this part of our brains play the entitlement card on you.
The workaround is to only be entitled to the work.
If you’ve been an employee for most of your life, feeling entitled to great results or an even trade of time and effort, the level of intensity of feeling entitled to the results will be even greater. This is because our brains have been wired to trade time for money. Super common pattern and not an easy one to break, but it can be done.
If you struggle with a feeling of being entitled to great results and it’s getting in the way of your production, a sticky note on your computer that says, “I am only entitled to the work” should help you rewire your brain.
Undesirable results in most cases are not signs to retreat, start a new project, blame the marketplace, become a loser, etc. It’s just feedback to adjust your approach until you get the results you’re after.
Something else worth mentioning is, what are the results you need to get so you feel your effort was worth it? Most have no clue! For sure this is a recipe for frustration.
Writing a Kindle book and harboring a desire to become one of the best selling authors and have Oprah call you begging to be on her show to promote your book is also a recipe for lots of frustration.
So what results would cause you to feel like it’s been worth it? Specificity and clarity in this area will serve you well.
If what you do is what you love, none of this stuff will matter because you get joy every-time you sit down and work. Any results are like frosting on a cake. This is why so many “gurus” talk about loving what you do I feel.
Remember, we’re only entitled to the work.
I need to be reminded of this stuff too from time to time.